Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
