On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize