in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Randomize
