I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Randomize
