She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
