god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I would fuck him just for his dog
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
