I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Randomize
