your thong is hanging out like whoa
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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