So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Randomize