It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
drinking out of a sandbucket again
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Randomize
