What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Randomize
