I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
