i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize