it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
