so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Reggie can tackle my bush.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
