wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
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