there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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