I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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