My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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