Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
