ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Randomize
