their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize
