Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
How external is "for external use only"?
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
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