24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
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