i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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