YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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