90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
