So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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