hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
the day after is always just damage control
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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