I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
