This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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