i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Randomize
