I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
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