Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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