To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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