More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Randomize
