I'm really into asian looking animals
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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