i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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