Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
You just made me feel so damn special
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize
