Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Fuck appropriateness.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Randomize
