i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Let's get the cat blown out
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
