I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
