if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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