69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
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