if i died would you start the facebook group?
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
