i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
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