Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize