i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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