Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
I think people are normalizing furries
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
