am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
