We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
You left your phone here
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